New Mom, life, babies, Post partum

Snap Back

Snap back really irritates me.

Yeah maybe..

Maybe I’m irritated at my own body. My body who failed to snap back. I have stretch marks. Lots of them. All over my belly. I hate looking at myself in the mirror.

I should appreciate and love my body though. This body created and continues to nurture my 9 month old. But, it never snapped back.

I guess I’m still in the mourning phase. You know, the phase new moms go through – the phase where you mourn your old self, your pre-baby body, your pre-baby soul.

Having children is a wonderful thing, don’t get me wrong. It is life changing. I guess the reason I hate the term snap back so much so is because there is no such thing. You can’t snap back when there is nothing left back there. Even if you’re one of the moms that look incredible, you’re still different. The old you is gone forever. Things have been moved, shoved around inside of you – you’re never the same.

I guess the reason for my bitter post is because this past weekend was my first time in a bathing suit in roughly 2 years or so. It was very difficult to say the least. I mean it took me 8 months to get into a pair of jeans!

I work on self love every day. Every time I look at my baby I know it’s worth it. I forget that I have the stretch marks and the cesarean scar. Her smile truly does light up my life. I want to teach her to love herself and for this I know I must love myself first.

Slowly but surely this will eventually happen …


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